Slaying the Imposter Monster
Picture this: you’re sitting around a conference table with your colleagues, discussing an important upcoming project for the team, when your supervisor calls on you to share your opinion. As the others turn their expectant gazes to you, you freeze up. “Why me?” You think frantically, overcome by a wave of apprehension. “I’m not qualified for this!”
This is an example of a case of imposter syndrome; side effects of which include anxiety, frustration, lack of self-confidence, burnout, and shame. According to the Journal of General Internal Medicine, up to 82% of people face feelings of imposter syndrome, struggling with the internalization that they didn’t earn what they’ve achieved and are a fraud.
Imposter syndrome can cripple one’s personal and professional growth, so we’ve brought in expert panelists to help you confront the evil and battle it head on. In this week’s Tweet Chat, Joyce Marter @Joyce_Marter, Samantha Demers @samanthademers, Sravya Attaluri @sravya_attaluri, and Cathy Cassata @Cassatastyle are here to share their advice on how to overcome imposter syndrome, so you can fulfill your TRUE potential!
Missed the Tweet Chat? Here’s a recap:
Q1. What is imposter syndrome and what are some typical indications / symptoms? Have you encountered imposter syndrome yourself? What did you experience and how did you address it?
Samantha Demers: Imposter syndrome is when you feel like you are a fraud. No one has told you that you are, but you feel strongly that you don’t belong and someone will find out that you shouldn’t be in the job, role or position that you’re in. Imposter syndrome shows up as:
• Perfectionism
• Procrastination
• Thinking one day I’ll be brave enough to do it
• Comparing yourself to others and thinking you can’t compete
• Waiting for the perfect time to start (but the perfect time never happens)
Sravya Attaluri: Imposter syndrome to me manifests as self-doubt and low self-confidence. I've experienced it during many phases of my life from thinking I wasn't smart enough for my dream university to feeling like I wasn't qualified enough or old enough to run my own business. I would be taking meetings with clients twice my age and yet struggle to believe that they did truly see value in my work and abilities. I’d have to intentionally remind myself that they were seeking my expertise for a reason.
The more people that reached out and wanted to work with me, the more I started believing that I must be doing something right even if it felt uncomfortable in the beginning. I realized I needed to trust my abilities, NOT the doubts in my head.
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Q2. We all get by better with the help of others! Who do you turn to when you’re struggling with imposter syndrome? What resources can you refer to to help make the most impact in overcoming the obstacles that come with feeling like a fraud?
Sravya Attaluri: My imposter syndrome manifests in self-doubt so I try to actively shift my mindset whenever I recognize myself indulging in negative thoughts. I take time to celebrate small wins which helps remind me that I am making progress & that I am worth celebrating.
When I was first starting out, talking with my family and partner about my imposter syndrome was helpful because they’re always great at reminding me of my own capabilities. It's important to have cheerleaders in your life! Now that I have a team (http://hellocolour.com) it helps to know we’re all working toward something together and that our strengths complement one another to deliver our best work!
Deb Coman @DebComanWriting: The best antidote to imposter syndrome is cold, hard facts.
What does the data say about your results?
What outcomes are your clients achieving with your help?
What do trusted people say about you and your skills?
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Q3. When are the most common times that you can expect imposter syndrome to be more experienced / relevant? How do you keep these potential triggers in mind as a precursor or indicator that it’s likely to sneak up on you? What proactive tips help nip it in the bud?
Samantha Demers: Imposter syndrome happens when you stretch yourself. When you’re a little (or a lot!) outside your comfort zone. You’ll usually feel it when you’re doing something new, big and exciting. You’ve had imposter syndrome before:
• First job
• First promotion
• First date as a teenager
• First time speaking publicly or performing
Now, the things that felt really scary and hard feel easier and maybe effortless. Because you did them again & again.
Joyce Marter: It can also pop up when we are having a crisis of confidence or low self-esteem. Maybe we are experiencing other challenges in life that are causing us to doubt our worth. We all deal with these struggles as part of the human condition but there are tools and techniques to help!
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Q4. Perspective is everything! 👀 When you’re feeling like an imposter, what helps you adjust your perspective? What simple practices can you do daily to improve your mindset and keep the imposter syndrome at bay? How can mindfulness practices help you recover from imposter syndrome?
Joyce Marter: Connect with your essence--your deeper self through mindfulness practices to know you are innately worthy and deserving of all that is good. Celebrate the successes of others. Competition is related to a scarcity mindset while collaboration & happiness for others cultivates abundance.
Samantha Demers: You’re dealing with imposter syndrome because you don’t see your own value. You think that you’re not as good as someone else. Or you’re afraid that you’re not. Give yourself a break. You’re starting something new. And you are good enough. You’re just not as good as you will be one day. Let yourself grow to the place where you will be good enough. Let yourself try and fail. Practice in public. See what resonates. And try again tomorrow. Good enough comes when you get comfortable enough.
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Q5. Some experience imposter syndrome for a limited time (like in the beginning of a new chapter in your life) but for others it can be more consistent. How frequently do you encounter imposter syndrome? What are the best solutions for long term vs short term?
Samantha Demers: I have imposter syndrome any time I try something new or big or outside my comfort zone. Sometimes, I keep experiencing imposter syndrome for a long time. Short-term imposter syndrome solution:
• Keep at it
• Do the work
• Don’t be so hard on yourself
• Put one foot in front of the other
See where you’re improving. How far you’ve come. And the amazing traits you have that got you here in the first place.
Long-term imposter syndrome solution:
• Do deep reflection.
• Why do you keep feeling out of place?
• Why can you not accept your success or feel that you’re enough?
Practice mindfulness of what you’re feeling right now, at this moment. When you keep feeling imposter syndrome, take some time to sit with it. Write out your thoughts, fears and feelings. Getting to the root of it might bring some relief.
Paul Haury @PaulHaury: Do some mental time travel, will the failure even matter in the future, five, 10 years from now... that'll give us the distance to alleviate some of the anxiety, there, we have an easier chance of telling the inner itty bitty sh!%*& committee to go away.
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Q6. Is having imposter syndrome just a way of being humble? Why do you think it’s so common to struggle with internalizing success & accepting accomplishments or compliments? How do you reinforce your talents / worth and circumvent self-doubt? #WinnieSun
Cathay Cassata: I think it’s more than that. You can have imposter syndrome about some things and be really confident about other things. The issue comes down to fear of failing or losing what you’ve gained in terms of success, and worrying about what others think of you. Sounds simple but positive self-talk can help. Things like “I’m qualified. I’ve worked for this. I’ve done this before.” Also, I think trying to not put so much pressure on a situation is also helpful.
Samantha Demers: Having imposter syndrome means you care.
You have integrity in your work.
You prioritize excellence.
You have high expectations because you’ve succeeded elsewhere and proved you can put out great work.
Now you’re trying something new.
And you feel like your past accomplishments and success aren’t enough.
Because you’re a hard worker and have personal integrity, you don’t want to rely on the past - you want to prove (again) that you’re worthy.
Joyce Marter: Humility is detachment from ego and imposter syndrome is an aspect of ego--it is the voice of our Inner Saboteur trying to make us small. Practicing affirmations and positive mantras can help you replace the voice of your Inner Saboteur with the voice of a loving parent, best friend and compassionate advocate. My book teaches how in the chapter on Self-Love, something we all need to cultivate!
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Q7. Imposter syndrome can wreak havoc on so many unexpected areas of life. How can imposter syndrome affect or impair financial health? How does it affect or impair your work, relationships, and overall health? How do you overcome these challenges?
Joyce Marter: Imposter syndrome might cause you to not put your talents out in the world in a bigger way--neither sharing your gifts and wisdom & nor reaping the financial reward! I see this often-people not valuing themselves and negotiating for what they deserve in terms of salary or compensation, which impairs financial health. Squash imposter syndrome to welcome abundance.
Sravya Attaluri: Imposter syndrome can make us reluctant to ask for raises, increase our rates and even affect the caliber of clients we work with if we don’t deem ourselves worthy or qualified. I think the biggest way to overcome this is to focus on the facts, the successes and the wins and then review them as an outsider looking in. If you can value these qualities in others, you should be able to value them in yourself!
Evan Wyk: Failing to reach deadlines, not making budget, delivering poor quality, et al, can ruin a reputation which ultimately will corrupt your business & easily break up relationships. Needless to say, it points to one thing only: being POOR - in both life & health.
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Q8. How do you think your experiences with imposter syndrome affect your goal setting / goal achievements? What are the best methods for setting goals for yourself in the future?
Joyce Marter: I recommend strategies from sports psychology--envisioning yourself already having achieved that goal & allowing that to sink into your mind, body & spirit so you can embody that feeling and belief.
Samantha Demers: Set goals that:
→ You can control
→ Feel comfortable
→ Aren’t set in stone
→ Are meaningful to you
→ You hold lightly and pivot when needed
→ Allow you to assess what’s bringing you energy and what’s draining you.
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If you find yourself suffering from imposter syndrome, harnessing these expert panelists’ remedies can help you build an immunity to its root causes and rise to your true potential. Keep in mind that imposter syndrome affects people from all walks of life, so remember to support others as well and share the wealth of advice from this tweet chat!
To stay updated for more content like our Twitter Chats, follow @WinnieSun! Have a question for Winnie? Use the #AskWinnie to get your questions answered!
